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"We love because he first loved us." -1 John 4:19
I've always laughed
when someone asks "I have good news or bad news. Which one do you
want first?" And usually we all say "bad news!" So I'm going to
state the "bad news" first.
Cons. Sharing your life with someone. It is terrifying, as
an only child I am use to my own space and bubble, so letting someone else into
my bubble is icky. I know this isn't just for only child's. You may live in a
house of 8 brothers and sisters but you still have your own bubble and now
there's this person who wants to invade your permeable membrane and your brain
is like oh no! But your heart is like Omg yes love me! That alone is scary!
Which leads me to the next con, confusion! Ah confusion, like I said your heart
may want it but your intellectual self is like "noooo". This leads to
a spirit of fear. That probably shouldn't even have been there in the first
place but dating makes you over think way to much(another con!). Sometimes we think
that those emotions are placed there because they belong there but often times
they don't. They happen to be there because you are deathly afraid, maybe you
grew up in a household were parent love wasn't present. Maybe abuse, rejection,
and neglect were the main emotions in
your life, so your brain has set such a high wall for love to enter that
sometimes even the love of God gets pushed outside that wall. The last one is
heartbreak. *Sigh* I think many of us have been there and it hurts, like the hulk
came and said I'm going to rip your heart apart *hulk slam* yeah it's not fun
and no one wants it.
Now to the fun part!
Pros. Sharing your life with someone. After you get over
your insecurities and fear there is beauty in sharing your life, dreams, and
goals with a person. I'm not saying you are going to be perfect and that all
your problems should be fixed before you date because no sorry to break it to
you but you are going to be far from perfect and so are they. But there is
beauty in growing together and especially with God by your side, he will show
you how fear and confusion can not co-inhabit with His love, which should be
gloried in dating. I'm going to sound crazy but heartbreak is actually a
positive to dating (did I take crazy pills today?). But let me just explain,
having your heart broken actually allows you to grow. It shows you what you
don't want in a relationship and God mold you into the person he sees you can
be. Sometimes heartbreak is Gods way of pinching you and letting you know the
world is no fairytale and that there is hurt and pain but that He is the only
perfect love in your life and He is shaping you into the women/men that your
future spouse deserves, he is also doing the same with your spouse.
There is something about Christian communities that have
this idea that the first person you date is going to be your future spouse, to
some people that works and that's amazing! But to many it doesn't, and that does not mean God does
not love you or that you have failed Him in some kind of way. It just wasn't in
His plans for you, and he sees the bigger picture not just the corners like we
do.
Now look at all I said. It relates to dating another human
right? Well if you reread it, you may notice that these also pertain to God and
dating Him, not just humans! (she definitely took crazy pills). But yes your
dating life isn't only reserved for humans and God never promises us a spouse
but he does call us His bride. We are suppose to date Him first but sometimes
the cons get in our way and we forget to see the positive, just like human
dating. Dating is a wonderful thing. Dating Jesus is messy but it is perfect.
Dating another human and having Jesus as centre is just as messy but still
perfect because He is in it. Love never fails.
Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.” -Revelation 19:7-9
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